9/11

September 11th is a very reflective day for many of people. It will always go down as one of the most memorable days in history in many people's lives. While I personally don't know of anyone who died on September 11, 2001, there seems to be an unfortunate game of six degrees of separation. As I looked through the Facebook posts today, it seems that quite a few people on my friend's list knew someone who died or  who was effected by this very somber day.

I woke up on 9/11/01 sore and uncomfortable, popped a pain pill, turned on the TV and got back into bed. It was a little after 9am and I was on medical leave from work. Several weeks before my life had changed forever. I was admitted to the hospital and didn't leave until my colon and rectum were removed, two weeks later.  I was given an ileostomy. A bag. I was different than anyone I knew.

The discomfort I was feeling on that day is nothing in comparison to the mental anguish and physical Hell that many, many people would endure. The images on the news were terrifying. I couldn't imagine what was going through the minds of those in the twin towers trying to escape, those on the airplane that crashed into the Pentagon. Watching the Today Show, my pain went away. Instead I felt angry and sad as I tried to grasp what was happening to our country.

Seven years later, after several months of fistulas, abscesses (is that really the plural for abscess?), intestinal narrowings and other Crohn's fun, I was scheduled to have surgery on September 11, 2008. I almost didn't schedule surgery that day, because of the horrible events that happened in 2001. I felt it was a jinx. I decided that my thought process was ridiculous, so I scheduled surgery.

I don't remember much about that September 11th, aside from waking up and being told that I needed a blood transfusion. That and the horrendous pain. I also remember feeling fortunate enough to have my loved ones surrounding me.

I couldn't imagine going through the awful events of 9/11/01 alone, without family or loved ones surrounding me, thinking that this could be my last moment. Many of us go through trying times in our lives and want to give up. Just know that the feeling is temporary. No feeling is permanent. It does get better.